
Grieving in the New Year
by Rabbi Mary Raskin
Changing every evening, the moon gave them guidance
Showing them
Change was inevitable
Happiness would not last
But neither would sorrow
They were wrong to believe that
Sorrow always lasts
It just goes undercover occasionally
As when clouds cover the moon.
My ancestors worshipped the sun
They had to
The sun guided their seasonal planting times
The sun was so important they lit fires in the darkest of winter
To remind the sun to return in the spring
Their very lives were dependent upon the sun
The sun taught them fear
The sun may have brought vision, but it did not bring clarity
Every year they worried, would the sun return?
My ancestors understood the power of flowing waters
Rivers sustained life
Rivers created powerful boundaries
Rivers purified the impure
Rivers were Living Waters – Mayim Chayim creating
A boundary between the impure and the pure.
My ancestors believed touching death made one impure
Only Living Waters – Mayim Chayim could make one pure
I live on an island surrounded by a river of living waters
My grief makes me impure.
I cross the river continuously, yet I remain impure
I have yet to dip even my toe into the living waters
My grief overwhelms me
I’m told the pain, the physical pain, of grief will subside
I believe that
I’m told pleasant and happy memories will surpass memories of loss
I believe that
I do not worship the moon
My sorrow endures
I do not worship the sun
I have hope instead of fear
I believe in Living Waters – Mayim Chayim
Every day I watch and breathe in the water surrounding my island
I often cross over the water
Someday I will go through the water.
October / November 2024

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